When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausages are the wurst.
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
Velcro – what a rip off!
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
Earthquake in Washington, obviously government’s fault.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
Webster’s definition of ‘pun’ – usually humorous use of a word in such a way as to suggest two or more of its meanings or the meaning of another word similar in sound.
Credit: Thanks Lorrainne and Pamela